All over the blogosphere, posts are popping up about “what not to say to a parent of” a gay child, an autistic child, a chubby child, a child with a disability, a biracial child…you get the gist.
Here’s the thing: Most kids don’t notice that their classmate is autistic, has a disability, or whatever. And if they do, they really don’t care. The child with whatever “imperfection” isn’t the one with the hurt feelings. The parents are the ones with the problems. And they’re doing more harm than good by making a big deal out of what most people see as nothing.
Do you wonder why people are so concerned that they need to make a list of politically inappropriate things to say to them? Maybe they’re embarrassed by whatever their child “has”. (I used quotes because I’m not sure of the politically correct word there.) Maybe they’re trying to get other parents to feel sorry for them. Either way, it’s time to grow up. If you don’t want people to ask questions, don’t point things out. If you say, “My child is autistic”, or “My child is overweight”, people are going to notice that they are.
Are you trying to be the PC police, waiting to jump on anyone who might say the wrong thing? Are you mad at the world because you don’t have a seemingly perfect child and you want to blame it on someone?
If you tell me your child is autistic or gay or overweight, what is it that you would like me to say? Are congratulations in order? A sympathy card? If you make a statement like that to me, I’m assuming you want to have a conversation with me about it. And then I’m going to say things that are on your list, because I don’t know any better. And if I don’t say the things on your list, there really is nothing else for me to say, so maybe I should just say “Okay, bye” and walk away. Pretty ridiculous, isn’t it? If you don’t want to talk about it, then stop talking about it. My life isn’t going to revolve around what I shouldn’t say to you.
Maybe I should just say “who cares?” Because I really don’t. To me, your autistic, gay, overweight child is no different than mine. He’s a child. Your child. My child has her own “imperfections”, and I don’t go around pointing them out to people so that they discuss them with me, because, quite frankly, they are none of your business and I don’t want to talk to you about it. God made each child an individual. They all have strengths and weaknesses. So what.
Where do I get off saying this? Because my child has a disability that is very obvious to anyone who meets her. And in the almost 3 years she has been alive, I have not once mentioned it to anyone other than family and her doctors, and no one has ever said to me at the mall or at a restaurant, “I noticed your child has a disability.” Maybe they do notice, or maybe they don’t, because they have their own lives. If the day came that someone did say something to me about it, I would simply tell them I’ve just escaped from prison and I’d prefer if they didn’t draw attention in my direction. I bet they’d go away pretty quickly.
Either way, I’m certainly not going to make a big deal about my daughter’s “problem”. She doesn’t know the difference. She was born that way. And she’s happy and thriving, in spite of it. I don’t need anyone to make me feel better because my child isn’t perfect. To me, she is, and that’s all that matters. So go ahead, say whatever you’d like.
Not too long ago, I got an email from Influenster saying that I’d be receiving the latest household product to try. They didn’t give me any more details. I couldn’t imagine what it was they were sending me, so I waited by the mailbox patiently for the delivery.
Somewhat unrelated – I think my mailman hates me because I get so many packages!
When the box finally arrived, I found 2 full size bottles of Palmolive’s new soft touch formula. I don’t really buy too much dish washing detergent, because we have a dishwasher, but when I do buy it, I buy a big bottle and put some in the bathroom hand soap dispenser as well. It keeps me from having to remember to replace the little bottle of dish detergent and the little bottle of hand soap all the time, and the less I have to remember, the less I can forget!
Palmolive must have had me in mind when they made this, because these detergents seem to have been made for the double duty. Not only do they have the grease cutting action of the original Palmolive that we know and love, but now they’ve added (depending on which formula you buy) Aloe, Vitamin E, or Coconut Butter. So your hands stay soft and smooth, especially if you’re one of those unfortunate enough to have to do dishes daily. It also comes in pretty colors – pink, green, or off white, depending on the formula, so it’s sure to match with any decor if you…choose to…leave it on the side of the sink like I do.
I received the Vitamin E and Coconut butter formulas. I kept the Coconut butter and gave the Vitamin E to my mom to try. She washes dishes by hand every day, so she definitely appreciated the gift. It’s one of those products that seem so insignificant until you try it and then wonder how you ever lived without it. Never thought I’d say that about dish soap! Thank you Palmolive and Influenster!
I have been looking at some great ideas on Pinterest lately and I can’t wait to try EVERYTHING!! Anyway, someone had pinned a project they did to customize their children’s sheets by putting their artwork on them. Cute idea, but seemed like a LOT of work. I just don’t have time for that sort of thing these days. It’s hard enough fitting in a shower, never mind hours and hours of tracing artwork.
So I took a crib sheet I forgot I had (don’t mind the wrinkles. It’s been put away for about a year)
I got out some fabric markers and put A’s name and date, then gave her the marker to make her own artwork.
This worked out well in the beginning…
Then she got bored.
Big sister M even got into it and helped a little.
And then we were done! M is hiding behind it so I could take this picture. I don’t want to put it on the crib until it’s washed.
I think it makes a great keepsake! When she’s too old for the crib mattress, we’ll put it away and make one for a “big girl” bed. What do you think?
This post brought to you by ZzzQuil. All opinions are 100% mine.
It's no secret that I suffer from insomnia. Unfortunately, my daughter has developed it as well. At 16, she needs rest more than ever. She's a Junior in high school, and it's time for final exams. Being well rested is important. As far as my insomnia goes, I've tried almost everything, including prescription medications, which have a list of side effects as long as your arm. They also leave me feeling groggy and cloudy in the morning. Over the counter products are available, but they often include other unwanted ingredients, like medication for pain or cold symptoms. Before ZzzQuil, I hadn't tried anything with my daughter, but since it contains the same active ingredient as your common over the counter antihistimine, and she takes allergy medication frequently, I didn't worry.
ZzzQuil is a nighttime sleep aid made by the people at Vicks, which is a trusted name in my house. The active ingredient is the same as the one in your popular antihistamine. I tried the Warm Berry liquid. While it certainly didn't taste like candy, it didn't taste bad at all.
It came with a little dosage cup, and I took the recommended dose. About a half hour after I took it, I started to get a little tired, so I went to bed. The next morning, I woke feeling rested and refreshed. My daughter tried it that night, and she also felt pretty good the next morning.
When used according to package directions, ZzzQuil is safe and effective, non habit forming, and can be used by ages 12 and above. I encourage all of you to give it a try if you experience occasional sleepiness. You can find out more information about ZzzQuil at http://zzzquil.com. Let them know what you think using the hashtag #ZzzQuilNight, and be sure to like tem on Facebook!
Happy Sleeping!
*ZzzQuil gave me this product sample for review purposes. All opinions are my own.*
Well, here it is – the first new post on my new site. Even though I’ve been blogging for a while, I forgot how it felt the first time. It’s like being a new kid in middle school – What if they don’t like me? What if my design isn’t pretty enough? What if I fall on my face?
All scary thoughts. Perhaps not quite as scary as my friend above. Ew. Actually, that is not the moth that was staring at me from my window an hour ago. I was too afraid to get close enough to take a picture of my moth. He was as big as my 2 year old. I pictured him crawling into bed and stealing my pillow, his hairy moth legs grazing my earlobe as I slept. He was so big that J took note of his “wingspan”.
But I digress.
It’s downright scary starting a new blog. And right now, I’m writing to no one, because I don’t even have one silly follower over here yet. Essentially talking to myself. Like the kid in middle school with no friends, or the blogger who is about to be consumed by a moth the size of Texas (the more I think about him, the bigger he gets).
So, for those of you who have wandered here from One Sleepy Mom, welcome to the new site! For those of you who haven’t, wanna be friends? Feel free to say hi below! I can’t wait to meet you! Let the fun begin!
In the world of Mommy blogging, there are the Mommy bloggers, and then there are Moms who Blog. I am a mom who blogs.
Recently, as those of you who have been here a while know, I was sucked into the Mommy Wars. Months later, I still sit here thinking about the fact that there are people out there that are more concerned with my parenting choices than I am. I don’t want my audience to be a bunch of moms fighting over who is a better parent for whatever reason.
Do I talk about my kids? Sure. But not with every blog post, and it will be a cold day in you-know-where before I discuss my children’s bodily functions with any of you. That’s just not me. It’s fine for some, but I believe that some things are better left unsaid.
Now that A is a little older, I really don’t have a lot of interest in baby products besides toys and books, and even then, there are only so many things to say about a Doc McStuffins doll. According to my RSS feed reader, I don’t read about those things either. The majority of blogs I read are deal blogs, DIY blogs, beauty blogs, and food blogs. If I need a solution to a parenting problem, I specifically Google it, and I’m grateful to all the Mommy Bloggers who have shared things I won’t, but I’m not the one to stick around and read about other people’s toddlers and how many times they used the big boy potty today. I subscribe to Parents magazine, but only because I use the Gymboree coupons. I dig through for the coupon, recycle the magazine, and sit down with the latest issue of Cosmo. I spend my days watching Disney, taming tantrums, and answering the question “WHY?” every second of the day. At night, when she goes to bed, the last thing I want to do is talk about more kid stuff.
If you’re wondering why I’m telling you this because I can write about anything I want, you’re absolutely right. BUT, the name of this blog is One Sleepy MOM. Not One Sleepy Stephanie. And while I am a mom, and I love my kids more than anything in the world, I feel like somewhere along the line I’ve lost my identity. I don’t want to be identified as just someone’s Mom. I want to be Stephanie. So I’ve decided to end One Sleepy Mom. I’ll be transferring all of the old stuff, but as of May 17, this blog will no longer be updated. After that date, you can find all the old stuff and the new stuff at http://onesleepymom.com. I hope you’ll all join me, but I’ll certainly understand if you were looking for something more mommy-ish. There are lots of things I want to try and do and see, and I plan to blog about them all over there. Because at the end of the day, I’m still Stephanie.
I’d never heard of Hugo the happy starfish before, so when I was asked to review it, I figured it would, at the very least, be something I could read Hugo the Happy Starfish, The Secret to Happiness, to A.
She loved it.
The basic story is that Hugo the Starfish is sad, so he looks for happiness under the sea. He finds it momentarily, in one hour, one day, one month, and one year, but after those spans of time are over, he feels sad again. Turns out the only thing that makes Hugo’s heart do somersaults is sharing with others, and that happiness lasts forever.
So what did I think?
I thought it was great. As soon as I opened the package I was impressed. The hardcover book is beautifully illustrated (the brilliant colors draw you in immediately), it’s just the right length (28 pages), and it conveys a great message to kids. It’s written well enough to grasp the attention of the little ones, like A, and it will even hang on to the attention of an adult! (I couldn’t wait to see what finally made Hugo happy!).
There are also a few English to Spanish translations – as seen below – which add to the learning.
I also love how the book invited the children to draw in the last page – a picture of themselves making someone else happy. A is a little too young to grasp this right now, but we’ll fill in this page soon.
Hugo, The Secret to Happiness is written by Suzy Liebermann, who also writes other stories about Hugo, each delivering a different life lesson. You can learn more about Hugo at www.mystarfish.org. The books are also available in 7 languages through Amazon ebooks, and I have already added a few to my Kindle library.
I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.
Though I’m pretty lucky and I don’t look my age, I do remember my first wrinkle. I was in the hospital visiting someone who had just had a baby, and it was the day before my 28th birthday. I looked in the mirror, and to my horror, there it was…a big crease under my left eye. I’ve learned a few tricks over the years – and some of the ones I’ve listed below are from the internet.
- Sleep on your back to avoid pulling on facial skin. If you just can’t sleep that way, use a satin pillowcase to avoid pulling on your skin. I have actually heard of this to prevent hair loss, but never aging. (Just ordered one!)
- When you apply makeup, use your ring finger. It has the least strength of all of your fingers, and won’t pull the skin as much. Try to “dot” makeup on instead of rubbing. Also, be sure to apply makeup in an upward and circular motion.
- Don’t smoke! This really needs no explanation, but the chemicals are really bad for your skin.
- Always use makeup and moisturizers that contain a broad spectrum sunscreen.
- Wear big sunglasses to keep from squinting. (Remember that old wives tale – keep making faces like that and one day your face will stay that way!)
- Exercise. It increases your blood circulation and promotes new cell growth. (UGH. I’m so sick of reasons to exercise!)
- Water, Water, Water! They say you should drink about half your body weight in ounces of water. So, if you weigh 150, you need about 75 ounces daily. Water keeps all of your body parts healthy – not just your skin.
- Eat/drink antioxidants to help your body eliminate free radicals – they lead to aging.
- Wash your face and neck every night to get rid of all dirt, makeup, and oils. Rinse with cool water and pat dry. Then moisturize well.
- Get enough rest. Rest helps the body recover, and restful skin is beautiful skin. (I love reasons to sleep more!)
***When I was about 12, I met an elderly woman that my mom introduced as a friend of my grandmother. The woman was absolutely beautiful, and looked about 40 instead of 80. I asked her for her secret. (I’d never do that today, but 12 year olds have little shame!). She said she took vitamins all of her life, and she thought that might have helped. I started taking vitamins that day and have taken them religiously every day since. I don’t have any sort of scientific evidence behind that, and I don’t know if that is part of the reason I look young, but it’s worth a shot!***
Now that you’re well armed – join me in the battle of the wrinkles!
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Despite what people think, there is a whole lot of good in New York City. Sometimes you just have to know where to look.
Sing for Hope is a New York based organization that strives to make the arts accessible to all individuals regardless of poverty or disability. Sing for Hope volunteers provide arts education and outreach to undeserved communities. They have a team of street pianos New York volunteers, and other individuals who can bring the joy of music to people who otherwise would not have the exposure. The volunteers at Sing for Hope are mostly professional artists who seek a way to give back to the community that supports them and their work.
Regardless if your passion is dancing or playing a musical instrument, you can find a way to volunteer your time and serve the communities of New York by joining one of the programs at Sing for Hope. You can provide healing arts therapies to hospitals and health care facilities by playing for the enjoyment of those suffering from illness, or you can teach acting, singing and dancing to young children in urban communities.
The Sing for Hope pianos are a specialty program of street pianos that play in various boroughs throughout New York. Volunteers offer their time and services to play for tourists, as well as those just passing through iconic neighborhoods such as Central Park or Times Square.
This is a sponsored post. You can review my full disclosure and affiliate policy here.
Sorry it took me so long to get this Voxbox review to you all – it has been a busy, busy month! Thankfully, I was selected for the Sugar n Spice Voxbox from Influenster. There are a lot of time savers in here! This is what I got:
I can’t figure out how they got all that stuff into that box!
First, the Nectresse, made by the same people that make Splenda.
I do love the fact that it’s not laden with all kinds of crazy chemicals. It’s 100% natural, made of real monk fruit, yet has zero calories per serving. It’s okay, but I don’t love it. It has 2 grams of carbs per packet, and I don’t think it’s sweet enough. I needed to use 3 in my coffee, which amounts to 6 carbs. Not what I’m looking for in a sugar substitute. You can try it yourself - a box of 40 packets runs about $3.99.
Vaseline Spray & Go Moisturizer Total Moisture
This spray-on moisturizer does exactly what it claims to do – it absorbs super quickly. You literally spray it on and move on with your day. I like it a lot. But, (and there is a but), it’s rather awkward for the back parts. I ended up spraying it in the back of my hair while trying to spray my back. For legs and arms, though, it’s awesome. $7.99 for a 6.5 oz can, and I’ve seen these in all the local stores.
belVita Breakfast Biscuits
Baked and formulated to release energy all morning long. No high fructose corn syrup, 18-20 grams of whole grain and let me tell you, these are YUMMY! It’s my new favorite breakfast food. I give them to A too – she thinks she’s having cookies for breakfast. Whatever works! $3.69 for a box of 5 packets of 4 biscuits.
Dickinson’s Original Witch Hazel Oil Controlling Towelettes
I’ve never used witch hazel before, and I’m in love with the convenience of these towelettes. They’re a good size, and you could do your face twice with one if you wanted to. I like how witch hazel gets rid of the facial oils in a snap. You can even do it in the bathroom at work. It only takes a few seconds to de-grease and refresh your face. The downside? Witch Hazel smells gross. Don’t sniff and wipe at the same time. $5.99 for a 20-count box.
Colgate Optic White Toothpaste
Colgate Optic White Mouthwash
Colgate Optic White Toothbrush
The Colgate Optic White Regimen not only tastes minty fresh, it gets your teeth whiter in 5 days than toothpaste alone. Bonus: The packaging is pretty, and it doesn’t make your bathroom ugly if you forget to put away the toothpaste. The toothbrush has different types of bristles to get in all the cracks and crevices, and the back of the brush is bumpy for tongue and lip cleaning. We’ve been swearing by this regimen in my house for quite a while. Can’t go wrong. Toothpaste: $2.99 for a 4 oz tube, mouthwash: $2.99 for 8oz bottle, and $2.99 for the toothbrush.
So…let’s say you’re having a busy day. You can grab a package of Belvita biscuits, give your face a quick wipe, give your body a quick shot of moisture, and all you have to spend time on is your teeth. (And maybe your hair, but you’re on your own with that one. I go with the ponytail.)
About Me
Hi! Welcome to the blog of a somewhat nonsensical,constantly dieting, nail polish addicted woman living in beautiful (but incredibly unexciting) Upstate NY. The area may be a tad boring, but my life never is. Stick around - you never know what you'll find here!
